Kimesha Coleman and Retired Detective Mike Carroll, Panelist at the Come On, Let’s Talk
Dallas — Feb. 24, 2016 —Come on, Let’s Talk round table hosted by domestic abuse survivor and founder of BP Ministries, Barbara Pettis was held on Sunday, February 21, 2016 at the Living Water Worship Center in Dallas, Texas. Barbara invited Pastor Marlon T. Perkins, Transformational Coach Kimesha Coleman, Detective Mike Carroll, and Counselor Dr. Janice Pettis to discuss teen dating violence and domestic violence in the community.
Pastor Perkins opened the workshop with a devotional word on how a person would heal from a traumatic experience as domestic violence. Pastor Perkins gave survivors 3 steps to healing and moving forward.
1. Focus. Focus on the greater things ahead and not your past. Create a mental picture of what can “be”.
2. Fidelity. As an aspect of integrity, one must become whole. Whole in spirit, mind, and body.
3. Faith. Have faith in God. You cannot exceed when you are back peddling. You have to move forward.
Author of “He Loves Me Not: Buried Tears of Betrayed Love”, Kimesha Coleman followed Pastor Perkins sharing her story of at the age of 15, she was held at gun point by her 17 year old boyfriend. Kimesha pointed out that while in the situation she had more compassion for boyfriend’s life that lead her to tears and pleading for his life but not for her own as he held the gun to her forehead. Kimesha noted that having boundaries and standards for yourself accompanied with a healthy self-esteem will enable a person to quickly identify if they’re in a toxic or even dangerous situation early on. Low self-esteem and feeling of unworthiness were issues Kimesha struggled with and that keep her in the cycle of abuse from childhood into her adult life.
Dr. Janice Pettis spoke on self-esteem and the effects of your subjective emotional worth. Dr. Pettis mentioned that we often gauge our self-esteem according to the things we have accomplished and experienced in life. Self-esteem is the overall view or feelings towards one self and with counseling clients are able to identify and change these negative feelings towards self.
Detective Carroll presented outstanding data on domestic violence which included sensitive images of homicides murders of domestic violence victims. One alarming fact Detective Carroll gave was that 92% of “All” women killed are killed by their husbands, boyfriend, or ex-partner. Detective Carroll made a very eye opening point on the how Michael Vick actually served time for dog fighting and yet men are brutally beating their wives and in most cases receive no punishment at all. Detective Carroll showed the video of Ray Rice punching his “now” wife and dragging her unconscious body out of an elevator, along with photos of a de-headed woman shot several times in her car by her ex-boyfriend. He pointed out that usually early in the relationships the abuser will give clear signs and to pay attention to their words and especially their actions. Women should pay attention and listen to their gut when interacting with people and not bypass the warning signs that are naturally given to us by instinct.
Come on, Let’s Talk was a very informative workshop that both adults and youth were able to gain insight on what to look for in abusive relationships. Domestic violence starts with settle unnoticeable actions and words that you may not feel are a threat at first but should not be overlooked. A man with controlling issues, feeling of hopelessness and anger is highly likely to kill. As women we tend to focus on nurturing and trying to fix the relationship where as we should be leaving the relationship. Paying attention to the signs mention above could save your life or the life of someone you love.
About Kimesha Coleman
Kimesha Coleman is an inspirational speaker, transformational coach, and author of the book “He Loves Me Not: Buried Tears of Betrayed Love.” She works with teens and women to help increase their self-esteem, cultivate decision making skills, and fine tune their self-approval through coaching and goal setting. Kimesha is a survivor of child abuse, teen dating violence, and domestic violence and specializes in working with others that have experienced some form of abuse.
Learn more about Kimesha Coleman at www.coachingbykimesha.com. For more information about “He Loves Me Not,” go to the book’s Amazon page at http://amzn.to/1m2ePAQ.